Quote Originally Posted by tacfoley View Post
Most of you with ideas about using

a. Your many years of practical experience, and

b. Common sense -

are overlooking the fact that many shooters these days are not looking for simple and cost-nigh-on-nothing gadgets made up of things that we throw away. They have a deep craving for hyper-technical 'solutions' to what, to us belonging to the OFB [old fartz brigade], are very basic needs. What is needed here is not a bit of burning oily rag in a duff pistol cartridge case, but a fully-automatic, piezo-electric device with a fully-chip-computerised high-temperature particulate exudant [smoke] residue throttling control that can be programmed for an infinite variety of 'particulate exudant exudant density values' via an app. It would also automatically send a message to your Twitface or whatever to inform everybody that you -

a. have begun the process of making some high-temperature particulate exudant residue.

b. are in the actual physical process of producing the high-temperature particulate exudant residue.

c. have now ceased producing some high-temperature particulate exudant residue and wasn't it just great? They will also be able to rate the experience for you on a WWPP - world-wide populaity poll.

You'll find that it will also place an image of you doing it on Google Earth for all your pals to see, admire, and envy. YouTube will also get a SME - short-movie entry, also linked in to your entry on the WWPP.

The device, called 'Compu-smokamatic', will be made by Apple, under the sideline trademark brand of iSHOOT, and have an automated interface with your iPhone that alerts everybody on your pals' list to expect a message on Facetwitch. Available in colours to match your iPhone, and a range of fully-integrated accessories including a secure voice-activated self-holding attachment unit - a built-in hook that attaches itself to its own built in loop - and a small but nevertheless useful combination cup-holder and magnifying glass unit.

It will sell for £120.00.

tac

Wot, no moon phase indicator?