Blimey... I can't believe I missed this Craig . I'm so sorry to hear of this.. only thing I can say about major family trauma is...
It always feels 20 times harder/worse to manage it during the event. Whatever happens you and your friends & family will deal with it, Just because we're increadably adaptable, human, and you just will. There will always be time to smile again and it can be amazing what can happen, it can be a huge surprise as something's you just can't imagine.
Hang in there mate nothing is ever completely sure or set in stone until it's actually happened and I'll put money on this event drawing your family closer.
All the best
Rhys & family