Rumours of my demise have been greatly exaggerated! I would like to have an epic tale of how I battled the monster rat but I have have waited for him twice now and it has been a no show. My neighbour has even been on a watch for him - he has an old FWB....not sure what model and he too has not seen him.

I swear he is a RAT SAS member....chocolate spread always gone but we now never see him. All I think I have achieved is bulk him up with free chocolate!

By the way if we were to make a film of this I would have to have Tom Cruise or the Rock to play my role....