No one is saying you shouldn't stand by your wife, or come back to work. All they are asking for is a bit of communication to let them know what's happening.
You've found the time to make several posts on here, so surely you could send a few e mails out to explain the circumstances.
Most people don't mind waiting for things if they know there are certain circumstances causing the problem.
You've come on here all shouty when you could have just explained what was happening, in a calm and sensible manner. You haven't really done yourself any favours.
I'll definitely be adding you to my "do not deal with" list.
Having said that, I do wish you the best and hope your current personal situation improves.